Dear Dick head
Our next
Collaborative meeting will be my last. If we cannot find a resolution after all
this time I will be seeking alternative methods. Not because I want the process
to drag on but because in March a fair compromise was reached. We all left the
meeting in March understanding that at last, we had all come to an agreement. Latterly
documents were drawn up to reflect this, time was taken by me and my solicitor
to ensure everything was in place for signing and completing.
However the
week before last, a bolt out of the blue, a letter from ***** to say ” On
reflection **** was now not happy with the agreed and discussed financial
settlement.” This was some two weeks after the March meeting. Coincidentally
this was also shortly after girlfriends arrival to the UK. Is there someone else
involved in our agreements? I hope not.
I suggest
you read through the Court Order draft document and consider the options.
I understand
you have concerns at not being able to get a mortgage whilst your name remains
on the mortgage. A secondary lender will accept a Court order, and
indeed you may have to pay a slightly higher interest rate but it is only until
May 2015. Alternatively, I can remove you from the Mortgage immediately but you
will not get any money, the proposed £ ***** until May 2015. I am already
borrowing funds to help the divorce process find a resolution.
I agreed to
take on half your Tax liability, which is due to your bad management of your
personal work finances, which I had no part in deciding. If I had been part of
the decision process then I would agree I should be liable but you made these
decisions and now want me to carry the burden. I agreed I would.
The March
agreement allows you financial freedom, allows you to keep 75% of your income
(25 % being Government guidelines for child maintenance using child tax
calculator https://www.gov.uk/calculate-your-child-maintenance figures based on £**** p/h x 37.7
worked hours a week x 48 weeks a year =
£**** child maintenance. This figure takes into account the boys stay with you
alternate weekends.) And gives you a
large cash payment plus you keep the land in South Africa plus I have said I
will honour half your tax liability. £**** barely covers the costs of our
extremely sporty, active boys and that is why you agreed in March to take on
some additional costs.
The current deal
will just about enable me to buy an alternative suitable property. As the main carer of the children I have a
limited earning potential going forward. I have no pension. I have the sole
responsibility of the day to day well being and care of our three children,
which limits my movements and work potential.
I have lost a great deal of my full earning
potential since giving up my career in 1998, which was agreed by both of us. I
would now be earning in the region of £50,000 pa instead I am now able to command
a maximum salary of around £28,000 pa. You currently offer me no additional
holiday support that is either guaranteed or pre arranged. This means all
holiday weeks have to be carefully planned, and my work needs to flexible
around the boys needs and demands.
You have the
freedom to go on holiday when you chose, at a time that suits you, I do not.
I am not
sure what more you think you need. This is not about me it is about being the
mother of our three healthy beautiful boys who need to be housed, fed, nurtured,
supported and cared for. I happen to be the one that is doing that day in day
out, it does have a value whether you believe that or not.
I am tired
of this whole process. I have IBS, eczema and recently had a massive allergic
reaction to seafood. These symptoms are all associated with stress. I want to
be able to move forward. To know that you aren’t going to walk into ***** Road
uninvited, to no longer receive horrible texts from you saying you don’t see
why you should give me money for our boys, when they have additional expenses.
I want this all resolved, completed and signed off.
However I
will not leave myself and the boys with barely enough, it isn’t fair. I would
prefer to let a judge decide than be bullied by you.
Kindest regards,
**********
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